What Determines Your Worth? - [website] Email Print
Published: 7th of Aug 2020 by: Shona Potgieter

Do you attach your worth to what people at work think of you (or what you think they think of you), or how they make you feel? What about your friends and family?
I guess a lot of us do it.

I went through the same thing, I've felt 'not as good as' or like my job is less important than person X', I've felt less than good enough and I've felt like a fraud. These feelings have been triggered by many people in my life, close to me and even people whose opinions I shouldn't really even be worried about. I know better, I know to not let it get to me, but it's a hard habit to break. And even though I've been mentioning these feelings in the past tense, they still hang around on a daily basis and my confidence has really taken a knock. Because let's be honest, it's hard to feel confident when you doubt your own self-worth.

Have you heard the saying: "what other people think of you is none of your business"? How true, and if you can master the art of taking that to heart and living by that rule- then you're on the right track and can look forward to taking a huge load off your shoulders!

Now the difficult part is the fact that we obviously value the opinions of the people close to us and often that includes our colleagues... But we could learn to draw the line (internally), especially those of us who tend to take things to heart- I'm not talking about constructive criticism- I'm talking about the things people say to and about us. You know those people who tend to say things with positive intention, but the delivery often misses the mark... Yup me too, and often we end up interpreting what we think they meant and causing ourselves unnecessary stress and heartache.

I'm not saying how we feel is all on us, or all on them, communication is a two way street after all... I'm just saying that I'm still working on aspects of myself and it's ok if you are too! And I don't mean trying to change anything per se, but rather strengthening my head and my heart. It takes a lot of Emotional Intelligence to know yourself, understand yourself- your reactions, as well as those of others. And don't underestimate that it's a continuous journey!

We often need to get to know different versions of ourselves, the only constant is change and the journey that is life often presents us with different versions of 'us'. But just because you're still on this journey of growth, doesn't mean you can't live your best life or should minimise your self-worth. You can be a 'work in progress' and a masterpiece all at once!

The truth is, you should attach your worth on who you know yourself to be, what you know you have achieved and those little things that make you, YOU!! Choose to focus on the positive- embrace the negative and move on, you're allowed to, practice that choice and soon it will become second nature. Make the decision to believe in yourself, to tell yourself how great you are- even when you don't really feel it. Then remind yourself to make that decision everyday... And for the love of all that is puppies and kittens, please try to not be so hard on yourself when you have a bad day- this is a process and progress is progress no matter how small. Oh, a tip for the days that you really struggle: Just remember that your dog thinks you're pretty awesome!!

Now let's take a look at another factor that could be affecting how you feel about yourself:

Perhaps you're struggling with the current situation we're all facing, the pandemic and Lockdown... I sure know I am. Maybe you've been retrenched, you're wondering how you will pay the home-loan, put food on the table, maybe your mental-health has taken a dip and you're just trying to get through each day. All these things can make us question ourselves, our success and self-worth. Please don't forget that these are extreme circumstances we're facing, we didn't see 2020 coming at us like this... I'm saying "coming at us", because some days it sure does feel like an attack- An attack on our livelihoods, an attack on our plans and dreams, and an attack on our sanity...

They popular movie reference "Keep on keeping on" has never rung more true. And I hope you find the strength within yourself to do just that. Keep trying, keep dreaming and please keep on smiling!

In conclusion, I want to offer our services at Staff Training. We offer some wonderful courses that have amazing benefits! So if you're looking for help with managing your stress, if you want to be more assertive or if you're interested in learning more about Emotional Intelligence- Please get in touch with us!
View our list of workshops >here<

And remember: Know your worth- then add tax!

Staff Training is a soft skills training provider. Email us at info@StaffTraining.co.za for more info or give us a call at 0861 996 660

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