Personal Space, Respect It! - [website] Published: 17th of Jan 2012 by: Miss Knowitall
Everyone knows at least one person who just does not understand the concept of personal space...
...so, being the know-it-all I strive to be, I’ve taken it upon myself to lay out a few facts on the subject for those who have been misinformed.
First off, let’s just make it clear that people need their personal space. When they are deprived of it they become agitated and physiological changes may occur in their bodies readying them for “fight or flight”. That’s not to say they’ll hit you, just that they’ll feel at the very least uneasy.
This in itself may explain why people tend to back away from you when you’re talking to them – it’s not your breath, you’re simply just too close – and they’re just trying to regain some of their lost personal space.
Now you may be asking yourself, “well just how close can I get to people before they start getting all ‘uncomfortable’ about it?” and the answer is that if you need to ask that question you’ve probably been standing a little too close for a long time.
It works like this: the amount of personal space people like to have is inversely proportional to a) how well they know you and b) how much they like you – meaning the better they know you the closer they’ll let you get (in most cases).
In the Western world we like what we’ll call our ‘social zone’ (customer interactions, business-based interactions etc.) to extend 1,2m to 3,6m around us, our ‘personal zone’ (office party, social events etc.) to be around 46cm to 1,2m, and our ‘intimate zone’ (lover, close friend, relative) to be around 15cm to 45cm.
You also get the ‘close intimate zone’, which is from 0cm to 15cm, but I think that if you’re violating people’s personal space to this extent you’ll need to read more than just this article before you get the hint.
It’s also important to remember that these numbers will differ from person to person and from culture to culture. If you’re unsure of how close you should get simply follow the other person’s lead by maintaining the invisible space bubble they seem comfortable with.
Consciously think about how close you’re standing; do people back away from you or seem more stressed when talking to you? Answer these questions and we all might be in for a more comfortable day at the office.
